Memo to Whiz

Start stocking the Eskies!

Max replacement

Sorry for previous post fellas.
Forget the football. As I am supposed to be a replacement for Max I have sharpened up my skills.
Yes I have been caught in the middle of a serious training session supervised by the Bungster himself. Note the superior hand position and interlocking lip hold. I think it took a further 6 hours to before Max was satisfied that I could even contemplate a bench position in his spot. (he is a hard task master).
After much tooing and frooing this was the conclusion. (dress up compulsory).
Umm we swapped at halftime BTW

Return of the Prodigal

HEEEEEEES BAAAACK. Bigger and much, much annoying than ever.
I will not keep my undies on in the changeroom and if you think the picture attached is offensive, grow a pair, I stole it from Statue's private 'Ramon' stash. CHELSEA FC WIIL win the premiership as all the other teams are PremierSHIT.
Call me any name you want I am just happy to be back with a great bunch of blokes. Just remember the call sign 'Give me the ball'

Maybe Capt, Hat has alluded to a new name for me with his Dildo aspersion (aversion?). How about "Coke" cause like Capt Hat you have all missed out on 'The Real Thing ' Hahaha

Bung out, Dildo in !!

As recently reported, the Relics have sadly lost a major contributor both on the field and to the Esky, Bung, (Max )is unable to play this season.

At a meetingof the LBT (Limited Brains Trust) last night, Crowch, Darchinyan and CapnHat decided to succumb to the relentless pressure and let the Dildo in. MickleDildo (Mick Tempest) was a former member of the team and has played with Vic and me for over 12 seasons. For reasons only understood by a clinical psychologist, he decided to prove he still had it last year by playing in the 35's. Since then he's been like a boy at a candy shop, licking the window and wanting to get back in. We discussed getting a good footballer, somebody who would pass and score goals, but decided we couldnt possibly bear the tongues in ear from the Dildo if we didnt. Thus the Dildo aspersion, a substitute for the real thing!!

Welcome back Mick, not that you ever properly left!! Capn Hat

A Relic Retires

Due to the shortened football season and his work commitments, Max has had no choice but to retire from the team.

Although we may miss him on the field, we will not miss him off the field as he plans to be the Relics No.1 supporter and retain his leading roll in emptying the esky.

Thanks Max for your contribution to the team, see you soon.

And, I guess that leaves an opening in the team for a new (old) player, I wonder if anyone is interested, hmm...

P.s. Thumbs down to the CCF Association who have decided to make their job easier by shortening the season.

Due to the bad weather, last year was a bad year for many teams who missed playing a third or more of their games. Which not only ment an uneven comp but an expensive one as well.

This year we don't have to worry about the weather anymore because CCF has guaranteed a bad year to most of the football teams they are supposed to be working for.

Too much excitement for an ageing Relic

Last week Gemma and her NSW Futsal side ( indoor soccer ) took out the National Title and over 4 days of competition they were undeafeted , which was exciting enough BUT today she got a letter to say she has made the

National u/15's team. WOW WOW WOW

That's my girl.

New Bitch Fails at First Test

The 2011 Beer Bitch has failed his first test. Twenty thirsty Relics were disappointed following the non-appearance of the phantom BB at their post Christmas Boot Camp. The boys were left high and dry after a solid twenty minute hit out at Frost (luckily Crowch had an esky full of beer in his boot). The only Relic who could manage half a smile was Dallas. A family holiday is no excuse Mr Bitch!

Whilst on the boot camp is was great to see the Relics, older and wiser, preparing for season 2011. Banker obviously enjoyed the Christmas ham and turkey, whilst Darchinyan actually looked to have lost weight over the festive season. Crowch was his usual self, barking orders left, right and centre. The Axe seems to have come through the break unscathed (we still have new year to contend with) and again displayed the same deft touches that have become his hallmark. Mickledinho, tried hard obviously keen to impress Relics selectors. Bung, however, was missing in action.