To the Relics

SHIT...SHIT...SHIT, I was only joking when I said I would take the money out of the esky jar for air fairs to the final so you did not have to chuck the game. Skinny arms you have no hope of wearing Flemos boots (aren't they great).



Missing my kisses from all the boys......... Number 1 supporter.

Ida

Smile- Thanks for the Season Guys

Guys, today was tough and a disappointing end to our season, but in fairness we've finished in our ladder position. I really wanted to win today and probably felt the loss more than in previous years. By the same token, I know I didn't play today as well as usual for yous.
We must remember that at our age, even being able to play is a privilege, many of our mates can no longer play, their injuries no longer permit them to . Each game we get is a bonus as one of our team mates from last season is gone forever, and my greatest supporter is missed by me so much. Few of you realise just how tough it was for me to continue to play this season.
What we have in the Relics is special, and as our older players retire and pass on the baton it's important to try and retain the team spirit for which the Relics are known. We all play because we love to compete and we still can, but that should never be at the expense of appreciating that we are lucky to be able to play.
Smile today if you can, remember the good times you've had this season and the positive things you've done. If you can't today, then smile tomorrow, but smile.
Its been an honour to have another season with the team and I look forward to the pleasure of still being able to play in the future.  Kindest regards from Hat, Flemo and Steve

Semis line up.

 

2012 Relics

Relics Charge Into Finals

The Relics have consolidated their 3^rd spot on the ladder with a comprehensive 2-1 pillocking of the Berkelers on Saturday. The Relics went into the match needing to win to be assured of avoiding undefeated Gosford in the first week of the semis. Not because we’re worried about them, but it will be much sweeter giving them false hope and then beating them in the Grand Final.

The named team was the strongest in form team all season, and continued our surprising new trend of strengthening at the right end of the year. Our confidence was up after a solid training session on Wednesday night (the esky was emptied).

Pre match was livened up with the unveiling of Flemo’s new personalised boots, causing most of the team to retain their sunglasses until just before kickoff. Coach Waz lost the toss, again, he really is a pathetic excuse for a tosser, but it was just as well, as changing ends is the closest we manage to a pre match warm up.

The Relics passed well early and dominated play with our own resident Rick Allen with ears, trapping first time and distributing very tidy balls to the other forwards. Wiz, Howler, Wheats and Phil were on top of their opponents and Howler was always pressing forward. Then the subs halted the momentum a bit and the backs had to work to keep the Berklers at bay. Fortunately Banker, Rob, Grant and Tony had them under control whilst Hat at stopper, merely had to waggle his boots in the sun to blind the opposition.
Just before half time the ref decided to try and even things up a bit, but reacted rather strongly to suggestions from Coach Waz and Hat that his whistle should have a pea in it, or was it that we wanted to pee in his whistle?

Anyway half our team were mugged by tackles that Mario Milano would have been proud of.  Meanwhile, Howler, miffed at the Berky keeper tripping over and blocking his only shot on target, surprised not only the Relics, but also the Berky keeper by getting a second shot on target. 
Relics 1-0.

Half time discussion revolved around the fact that John and Vic had a dozen shots between them and one almost went near the nets. Hat did his best to make up for Dallas’s absence, when it was suggested that maybe a free kick against Hat was merited, and he said that the referee and any body who agreed with him  could #$^%^^ !!. 

The second half started the same as the first with the Relics constantly pushing forward but failing to score. By this stage Vic had 7 Gaelic Football points, but the Ref hadn’t heard of the rule that 7 overs equals 1 under.  Good work just outside the box, saw Berkly use another Half Nelson to stop us, but this time the ref, who was facing away from Hats boots, saw it. Coach Waz, still smarting from his two feeble penalty attempts in recent weeks, stepped up to take the free kick. 

Berkely were worried when Hat ran up from Stopper position to confer with Waz. They suspected some sort of fancy boot  blinding technique. However I can report that Hat simply told Coach Waz that going on previous form he had no chance of getting top corner and he should just #$^^&$!! kick it into em and hope something happened.   He did, and it did, with Coach Waz smacking the rebound on his left sweetly into the net.  Note Waz, please take future free kicks with your left.  2-0.

Shortly after the ref was again counselled by Hat and Waz, about allowing Berks to run through players jumping for the ball. In retaliation, he then over-ruled his linesman who was in perfect position by stating that a pass back from Smokey to Bella had crossed the line. Of course the Ref could see, as he was at least 30 metres away at a 90 degree angle! Its still a carton though Smokey!

The Relics then kept the great Berks out of the rest of the game.  Hat at this stage , believing that he must be playing league because of the tackles on him, snarled at his forwards to stop running away from him (in truth they were fleeing boot glare) and launched an erratic 40-20 kick which wasted at least 2 minutes whilst the ball was retrieved from the creek.  A well deserved 2-1 win with good contributions from most.  Only two minor points for improvement this coming week, tie the forwards neck to their balls to keep their heads down when shooting, and rub some mud on Hat’s boots. It was also wonderful to see Glenda Dunlop at the game and catch up with her afterwards, as well as Dave and Alice Allan. Also thanks to regular supporter stalwarts Kathy, Sharon, Daniel, Josh and Sky.

Finally thanks Bella for talking one for the team.  The big man has lost his last 8 grand finals, so rather than jinx us he’s opted to miss the finals and  go to an overseas drinking finishing school so that he’s in top form for the Shoal Bay trip in November.

Next Saturday 11.45 Eastern Road, Killarney Vale

Hi guys.  Great 2-1 win today.  Unless Avoca beat Woy Woy by heaps we will be playing Woy Woy at 11.45 am next Saturday, at Eastern Road, Killarney Vale.  Easy way is up Entrance Road, turn left at roundabout before Bay Village onto Eastern Road, and its opposite the first roundabout on your right.  Parking is a problem and you need to be there at least 1 hour before kickoff, as card checks are 30 mins prior and they can start up to 10 minutes earlier than scheduled.

Line up 15 take 2.

Kick off 1pm v Berkeley Vale on Frost field 1.

Just had a look at the CCF Website we play Berkeley Vale at Frost 1                1300        18/8/2012
                                                               Doyalson v Gosford at Doyalson     1300       18/8/2012
                                                               Avoca v Woy Woy at Erina High     1200        18/8/2012

Grant

Finals M 45 B Details‏

this out today from CCF.

Can you please post on the web site.

Key info is that we are at Mangrove (as predicted) Saturday week at either midday or 2pm.

M45B	MINOR SEMI	Saturday 18 Aug 12	Bloodtree 2	12:00 PM	2nd vs 3rd - winner plays winner of Major Semi - loser is out
M45B	MAJOR SEMI	Saturday 18 Aug 12	Bloodtree 2	2:00 PM	1st vs 4th - winner plays winner of Minor Semi - loser is out
M45B	GRAND FINAL	Saturday 25 Aug 12	Hamlyn Terrace 1	12:30 PM	Winner is Premiers of their league - loser is Runner Up

Thanks

Flemo

Line up 9 take 2.

Kick off 1pm v Berkeley on Frost field 1.

Kincumber Roos FC- General Meeting, Monday 6 August

Key Points

Finals Rules

Card inspection . 30 mins prior to kickoff.

Players expected 1 hour before kick off

Golden Goal applies in extra time- 10 Mins each way

Only Players on the team sheet and coaches/ managers with cards are allowed in the dugout (this is a problem for us)

2 Good match balls required. Mark Piltz has new ones available

Line Marking- Frost. Friday 10^th.

Helpers required in the afternoon

Major Club Fundraiser- Initial Response disappointing

Tickets sales for the Hypnotist night at Davo RSL on Sat 11 Aug at 7pm are low. Please see if you can come.

This is the major fundraiser for end of season prizes. Cost $20 per head.

Club Finances.

Canteen has posted an above expected profit, despite the washouts, and partly due to use of field 3 by other clubs. Bar has

suffered greatly from First Grade being at an alternative field. This will not be a good year. Major club fundraisers have also been poorly patronised. Many good ideas for improving next year communication were discussed.

10 Year Awards

If you are due, please let team manager know.

Frost Reserve- Surface and Other

Club committee members met with Sport and Rec, Council and CCF last week. On Tuesday 7^th there will be a further meeting jointly with Council, CCF, Avoca and Terrigal clubs. This is to try and gain commitment to drainage and surface works, as well as grants allocation investigation.  There area lot of complex issues involved but this is a positive step toward getting some work done.

Kick off 1:40 v Woy Woy at Frost field 1.

GILLARD BACKS THE RELICS‏

It would seem that the resurgence of the RELICS has not gone unnoticed, even at the highest post of Australian politics, with Prime Minister Gillard DEMANDING a match report.
With her own popularity waning it is obvious that she is keen to latch onto any success story going around & use it to her own advantage. There is talk if the RELICS win the comp, she will accompany them on their trip away as the BEER BITCH !


This week the RELICS took the long road up to TWO HEAD TOWN to take on the RUSTICS from Berkeley Vale. The Rustics recent form reversal had the RELICS a little worried that they may in fact be facing an ALL AGE 1 side rather than the pedestrian grandpas that usually turn out for the Rustics. Whilst there were a few unfamiliar faces amongst the Rustics the RELICS were undaunted, confident they could contend with whatever team took the park.


Buoyed by the fact HEAD was again out of the team, the RELICS were feeling good about themselves, a win here and a loss for AVOCA would see the team jump into third spot and possibly avoid an early semi final against minor premiers GOSFORD. Once again though the team had to play without inspirational pizza flipper WAZ & WHEATS who had succumbed to a shoulder injury aggravated the previous week when he threw his hand in the air wanting to take a penalty.
Unperturbed ASS BIN made what he believed to be the right selections, and prepared himself to take what ever criticism that may come his way if the team failed.


The first half & the RELICS were all over the Rustics, TOLLY looked like he'd been shot out of a gun, running up the right edge like a dingo chasing a baby, crossing to the goal mouth on several occasions without result. Meanwhile VIC was covering more ground than JULIA GILLARD on an election week, chasing everything that moved, (thankfully IDA stayed seated all game ) unfortunately no goals, but hey ! we were trying hard.
Once again the midfield led the charge with none better than the ASS BIN himself. This man who could have been a JENNY CRAIG AMBASSADOR with the amount of weight he's lost, was inspirational. Chasing, passing, farting, panting.... he did it all with a minimum of fuss ! What more can YOU expect from an ASS BIN COACH ?
" Luv you long time Phil," NINJA thought telepathically, as he stroked HEAD's head in the comfort of his lofty hideaway in the Narara hills. " I will be waiting for you in the finals, my skinny adversary " he chuckled to himself.


Second half and it just seemed to be a matter of time before the RELICS would nail the all important goal. SMOKEY who hadn't paid his FULLBACK UNION fees & been banned from playing in the backs by BANKER & HAT, found himself in unfamiliar territory up front. Having bagged out pretenders up front in the past, it was some what of a surprise to see SMOKEY choke like he'd swallowed a 25 pack of Winfield Reds, when given a golden chance in front of goal. Trapping a quality cross & with no one to beat in front of goal SMOKE joined that elite group of RELICS to miss the unmissable goal. WELCOME TO THE CLUB !!!


Finally the RELICS got the goal they were looking for when a through ball from the backs found an unsuspecting JAFFA upfront, the ball bounced off his arse & into the path of the omnipresent HOWLER. Calls of offside from the Rustics were over ruled by the prepubescent referee & HOWLER was given the all clear to proceed. Shitting himself the closer he got to the goal area, the wolf boy finally delivered on a one on one with the keeper & limped off to the toilets to clean himself up.


10 minutes later & VIC was duly rewarded for another great game with a fine goal. Some what intimidated before the game with IDA's words ringing in his ears " score me a goal you skinny little shit or else I'll crotch ya " VIC really had no choice but to score.


Once again the RELICS showed they ARE capable of winning this comp. Solid performances all over the park. Great to see DALLAS back & playing within himself ( if you know what I mean ) great control mate, that's what will win us the gong.


HOWLER