The RELICS: July 2013

Sunday, July 28, 2013

Something Happened Yesterday...

Something that doesn't normally. yesterdays 1-0 loss to Budgewoi wasn't. WE beat them everywhere but on the scoreboard.. But we beat them with a handful of broken down crocks who had no right to even be on the pitch, let alone Budgewoi's huge No 1 pitch. Yesterday was one that those who weren't able to be there to see it will regret. In future years, long retired Relics will be sitting in their favourite corner of the Roos FC Bar at the Kincumber FC Clubhouse saying, "remember that day up at Budgie..". We got to the ground to find that due to an unfortunate combination of work and last minute hiccups we were probably going to be starting with 8 men, Yes, forfeiting was discussed, but we were there and every game may be our last, so lets play. Budgewoi had 14 and coming second they thought it would be a formality. Grant and Tolly were there barely capable of walking, just not an option. Tony & Becks were eyeing off the esky, both severely wounded. But Becks (he earned the name yesterday with a day of absolute guts) came with us to make 9, although he was also struggling big time. Barry (thanks so much for coming mate) arrived just as the game started to make 10, half of whom were carrying injuries that would stop most people. Then a funny thing happened, The Relics PLAYED FOOTBALL We shielded and kept possession, passed through the middle, played wide, passed back. Wheats and Zulu (Johnny Z) in the middle harassed the Smugglers who kept making passing mistakes. Barry was running wide and getting lots of ball although his kicking was astray, but whilst he had the ball they didn't. We mounted several decent attacks and 20 minutes in had 6 or 7 shots and they'd had one. Mick, John J and I managed to turn them each time, somehow we'd emerge with the ball and their one decent shot Bella had well covered. Then help arrived, Tony had managed to get the others to help pull his socks and boots on and slowly limped onto the field. OK, Not quite the cavalry rescuing the wagon train, more like a severely wounded trooper emerging with the last ammo box at Rorkes Drift, but even so, just sheer guts (or stupidity LOL). But he made a difference, even if Micks first pass to him was 15 metres in front of him with a "here go chase that" element. Sheepishly Mick realised and from then kicked it to his feet. Tony continued to play in space, gave us an option, and upset the Smugglers.Phil was everywhere like an angry ant and Banker was brilliantly holding the ball looking for walkers (not runners) to go pass him. The Smugglers were getting frustrated from not being able to penetrate the defence, playing wide and shooting from outside the box, with Bella just lapping it up and saying thanks boys. Half time and nil all. They were ropeable, all those subs and they weren't beating us. Barry had nearly scored, Wheats was desperately unlucky and Banker had narrowly missed twice. This shouldn't have been happening but it was. I could feel Tolly and Grants frustration at not being able to help, it was like watching a kitten at the mercy of a bulldog , but this kitten had grown teeth. In recent weeks we'd been easybeats, not gelling, having injuries, lack of training and double headers just all making things very tough. But we were standing up and giving it to them. Second half, Budgie tried to belt us out of the game. Wheats and Phil were constantly monstered from behind, and yes there was a ref. We still kept attacking and then they scored the luckiest of goals , managing to kick one from the end line despite JJ being right on his shoulder it looped over Bella's head and curled in. Just an absolute fluke. Other than that they only got one decent shot all day and then Bella denied them anyway. The result wasn't inevitable. We continued to attack, won many corners but just couldn't get the break. Didn't matter, we beat them on the park , we beat them on the beaches, and we never ever gave in. Where has this spirit been all season? A day to be proud of, to hold our head's high and think, just let us at you next time. I've been a bit undecided about next year, but I'm not now, if I can get back to full fitness and make the team, then I'm in. GO RELICS, I'm so proud. See me in twenty years time in my favourite corner of the Roos clubhouse and I'll tell you of the day that 11 Relics with broken backs and missing several teeth repelled 26 fit first grade Budgewoi footballers. Aaah memories...

Sunday, July 14, 2013

RELICS FALL SHORT‏

The 2013 season seems like it only just started but for the Relics its all over. What the fuck happened?
Having played a double header a few weeks ago and winning both, the relics were on a bit of a roll and thinking semi finals again.
Fast forward to the next two weekends and the relics haven't won another game and the semis are just a distant dream.
What the hell happened? obviously not much! who do you blame ? Philby? I don't think so, Ida ? not likely, Howler ? no he's to good looking, well WHO ???

The Relics are an ageing roster with players who cannot compete with the new, younger teams coming into the competition. Sorry boys but that is the facts. Not only THAT but we don't have enough POMMIES in our team like Terrigal & Berkeley. Players that can whinge like fuckwits but can also play a little bit as well.

What about a C comp ? ....... I am grasping at straws now, I know.

Look, no one knows how to to fine tune the relics. That's why we've gone thru more coaches than beer bitches in the last 4 years............ hold on, why don't we put the beer bitch in charge of the team Instead of a coach? BRILLIANT !!!! and while we're at it make BELLA captain !............. Now I'm really grasping at straws! FUCK what do we do ?

LAWN BOWLS !!! Well that's my answer. If anyone else has a better idea please feel free to pass it on to coach Philby I'm sure he will be pleased to hear from you. Otherwise I'll see you at Avoca Beach Bowling Club.

Howler.