Line up

Coaches & Managers Meeting- Season Info

Hi Guys.

Coaches and Managers meeting last night revealed the following points for the season:

• Frost open for passive training next two weeks only on Tuesdays and Thursdays
• Lights not expected until 2 April. We should be able to have two Wed nights before season starts
• Easter Monday (9th) practice match for us is likely. I will reapproach Wyoming
• Draw expected out on Thursday April 4.
• Expect our Wed night training allocation to be same spot (under lights) and time as last year
• Bar will continue to be open only on Premier Home games. Absolutely no team eskis (on any field) on these days
• AA6 and AA8 still seeking players. Let your friends know if they are right age group.
• Season launch at Kin Hotel this Friday night from 6.30 pm. Free food etc. Please make an effort to turn up and wear club gear

Kotter or Youth- Either way he's welcome back !

Guys.

Juts to confirm that Laurie Blair has accepted and will become the Relic's 19th registered player for the season. Laurie is an ex club president, but more importantly has the rare privilege of having played with Mick,Vic,Pete, Grant, Banker and myself. Hes a genuinely nice guy, and a pretty good footballer (once we get him fit).

I think he last played in 2006 and the club has been waiting for him to make a come back.

The signs appropriate (Laurie/Lorry) gettit ?

Holger Joins the Mick Dig

Believe it.

The Toll makes this weekend ring in ex A grade keeper (Mickledinho) cry.

Its another Adam and Goliath story, from 40 metres away an excellent strike from the rookie striker bullets to the top far post and into the net, embarrassing the professional keeper who could only stand and watched it go in.

As Mickledinho struggled for excuses, The Toll just showed him the finger and screamed words that can not be repeated on this Blog. Plenty of love lost here as usually very good friends will be arguing this event for years to come.

For The Roos

Thank you all for your company on Thursday. You are a bunch of nice guys.

( Did I say That? )

Soccer's here now I can tell you all where to go, how to do it, then tell you why you shouldn't have done it.
                                                 "No.1 Supporter"
                                                                  Flemo Mum

Tribute to Rosanna Fleming from Grant

It is with great sadness that I am writing of the loss of Steve Fleming's ( The Hat ) wife Rosanna on Thursday 15/3/2012.Rosanna was diagnosed with a particularly aggressive form of Breast Cancer just over twelve months ago.Some members of the team and the Kincumber Roos Football Club have known Rosie for fifteen years.In this time you could not miss her. When she turned up to games or Club functions there was no mistaking that chuckle and wicked sense of humour.If there was a function at the Flemings that laugh became louder and the humour more wicked.Those of us who received emails from her were also treated to other forms of entertainment.During the last twelve months Rosanna bore the various treatments and surgeries with dignity , grace and humour.There are not many people that many of us know that could have done the same.Having had a full weekend partying , dancing and catching up with friends Rosanna suddenly became ill and passed away peacefully.She will be greatly missed by a lot of friends , workmates , Club and Team members.Our condolences , thoughts and support go out to Steve , Alan , Kristy and Bec.

Training Until the Season Starts

The Club has just been advised by Gosford Council that this year, passive training areas will be made available to the club from 13 March. No lighting will be made available, no training if its wet, Fitness activities only. Kincumber Club has been allocated Davistown Oval with Seniors to use Tue,Wed and Thur nights from 6 pm to 7 pm.
I've told the club that we dont wish to use the option at this stage.
It also looks likely that we will get access to Frost earlier than normal and it may even be available on our spare weekend. I'm also talking to teams about a practice match at Frost on Easter Monday afternoon for those that won't be away.
Wed night training at East Gosford at 6pms still unless I update by mobile.

2012 M45B Competition Teams

Not yet fully confirmed, but preliminary teams for Mens 45B for 2012 are Kin, Avoca, Berkeley Vale, Doyalson and a new Woy Woy Team. Gosfod promoted to A's for winning the comp. A teams unknown but I've been told its a six team comp. Kincumber Allstars/ 35A combined team have nominated for 35Cs.

The Empresses new boots...

A stylish new look for posh this season. Custom made for day /evening wear. Will be a standout all season....

The Relics Form Guide

The Kincumber Relics have commissioned form guru Ken Callander to run his eye over the Relics for 2012 as they head into their first trial game this weekend. Ken’s form analysis reads:

Banker Boy Former top-liner who retains his zest for racing. Recent injuries have hampered his preparation for this campaign. Capable on his day and look to him when the going gets tough. Watch betting.
Belldale Ball Spirited gelding and former hurdler who is finding his feet on the flat. Comes to hand quickly and sprints well fresh. Usually plays in blinkers. Expect a bold showing.
Sulo Star Dour one-pacer suited to staying events. Will go all day (and night). Rumoured to have changed stables during his summer spell. Returns to racing after an unsuccessful stint at stud. Stays under notice.
Black Crowiar Veteran campaigner and stable star. Can quicken when whipped and will be full of running at the finish. Recently returned from a successful oversees campaign. Will make his presence felt.
Toe Jam Reliable conveyance who rarely puts in a bad run. Has been in training for some time and expect bold showing first up. Watch any market moves.
Bold Becks Impressively bred stallion with an exceptional strike rate. Stable star. Trained to the minute. Races handy and has won under all conditions. Go close.
Shadow Chaser Former Ascot and Doncaster star who has equipped himself well under Australian conditions. Capable of leading or taking a sit. Consistent performer who is well suited under the weight for age scale. Threat.
Rangiranghowler Spirited sprinter who is difficult to catch over the shorter trips. Can mix his form and usually needs a tight rein to produce his best. Look to him to improve his strike rate in 2012. Likes to lead .
Mr Blackbeard Under-rated performer who is at his best on fast tracks. Fitter for recent outings and likely to figure early. Has played well without luck in past preparations . Do not overlook.
Axe Mark Ungainly galloper with a big heart. Likes hard work. Comfortable in any conditions. Likely improver. Take on trust.
Head Butt Cheap buy from a Packenham ‘tried and true’ sale. Having his first season in the Relics stable and has shown some promise on the training track. Can tend to over race and expect his form to improve as the season progresses. Look to others.
Victorious Pint sized dynamo who has set the football field on-fire for many years. Multiple award winner who sets the standard for this age and grade. Expect a huge campaign. The one to watch.
Old Smokey Striking grey who has returned from stud duties. Renown for his powerful finishing burst at stud. Form has looked good on the training paddock and a strong showing is expected in 2012. Capable on his day.
The Fascinator Talented performer who is up in weights after some great performances in his last campaign. Suited to all conditions. Never runs a bad race.
Thewizthatwaz Seasoned performer who has had his share of injuries in recent outings. Looks to be carrying a bit of condition. Likely to need a few runs to find best form. Later.
The Rubber Rod One from the top draw. Versatile. Handy in the wet. Also likes it hard and fast. Responds well to the whip. Sure to be prominent.
Debbie Does Barrier rogue who is prone to pig root mid race. Brought down another runner at his last start. Returning from a short lay-off. Tongue-tie is off for this campaign. Likes to come from the rear. Watch market moves closely.
Mr Brady Having his first start for a new stable. Not seen in recent trials. Prefer to see. Looking elsewhere.

Ken Callander

A True Pommie- A Picture Tells a Thousand Words

Most of us don't notice our resident pom. Flying under the radar, he stealthily remains a shadow, pretending to dislike darts and to like cold beer, but some of us know better. His knowledge of English fourth division football clubs, spiky Adam Ant hairstyle and love of a cuppa tea give him away. And then there's his training get up. At our last Sunday training run he dazzled us all with his sartorial elegance, obviously straight from Saville Row. But most freakily can anyone else see the resemblance to the below super hero. Could we say, Captain England by day, shadow by night? Surely it's the same person, or maybe, only the shadow knows.....

Saturday Game and After Party

Hi Guys.

First trial match this Saturday at Narara Valley High school. Please be there by 12.30 for Relics shirt presentation, kick off 1pm. Opponents Kincumber 45D's- Simon, Kev, Muzz, Craig etc. We will be missing at least 3 players, possibly 4 so bring your game.

Also don't forget the Gosford Cavemen's band at the Rock & Roll night with $5 cover charge at Bill Sohier Hall, Shirley St Ourimbah from 6 pm till midnight. Food and drink available at cheap prices.

Go Relics

Waz survives no-confidence vote 7-6

In a tension-filled meeting the Relics have delivered Waz the captain-coach mantle for 2012.

This was the surprise outcome after the Axe moved a no-confidence motion earlier in the meeting. The knives were out! Whilst the no-confidence vote was a secret affair it is believed that the "Empire Bay Tavern" voting block carried the clearly nervous Waz to victory.

With restored confidence Waz nominated himself for captain and after an impassioned plea to fellow Relics about what he would bring to the team he was duly elected.

Sources close to the team believe that "sweeteners" were offered to Sulo and the Axe by Waz as reward for them to stand down leaving him as the only nomination. Expect Sulo and Axe to get plenty of game time in season 2012!

Congratulations to Waz on his election.

In his acceptance speech Waz launched into a spirited tirade about his expectations. He eye-balled his team. Axe and Smokey were told to ditch the fags. Becks was told to lose 30kgs. Head, Blackbeard and Ball were instructed to get haircuts. Dallas was installed as GK and the team was warned to expect a back to basics approach to training!

Waz re-affirmed his commitment to a cutting edge, contemporary approach to coaching and also shared some thoughts on some key plays the Relics will be using in 2012.

The views expressed in this post are not necessarily those of the author.

Flem throws Hat out of Ring

The leadership battle took a twist yesterday when the Hat declared he is a non-runner. Sources close to the team believe that a campaign will be mounted to install Axe into the position...watch this space and don't turn your mobile off!

Leadership Crisis in the Relics

A leadership spill is expected at training next Wednesday as a number of players vie for the Captain’s job in 2012. Disunity is rife in the Relics camp. It is understood, that in a secret meeting at the Empire Bay Tavern several weeks ago several relics got into the coach Waz’s ear demanding the leadership. It is rumoured Waz prefers a “leadership team”. Whilst details are sketchy it is likely that the following candidates will put themselves forward; Howler, Ball, Wild Thing, Hat and new boy Head. It is also understood that Dallas may be a surprise nomination!

Hat remains firm favourite.

Coach Waz is expected to ruled himself out as he has not been able to secure a vote from any player including himself.

After a week of frantic phone calls and damaging cat calling it is understood the voting pattern next week will go as follows:

Howler, Ashley & Jacki

Thing, Hat, Dallas & Ida

Crowy, Vic, Dildo, Toe, Blackbeard & Rosanna

Ball, Ida & John Doe



Head, Tolly, Banker, Ida & Smokey




Robbie Deans, Becks & Shadow

Waz is yet to show his hand. By the way Where's Waz.

Can't wait for the show down on Wednesday!

Relics New Trophy

The Relics now have a new trophy in remembrance of our team mate"Statue".

It will be yearly inhouse award for 'Best and Fairest' contribution to the team, (both on and off the field).

In saying that it will not necessarily go each year to the beer bitch.

Crowy.

We are one Club- Lets Help Out

Hi Guys. As you know there was a coaches and managers meeting last night to sort out the teams for 2012. It became apparent that there are several teams with too many, and several with too few. The Allstars have too few and could not currently field a team. Rather than the club lose one of its Over 45 teams, I suggested that the Relics could give 4 players to the Allstars, as there are several players in 35Ds who can now sub up for both teams if required. This is just like Second Division English Clubs loaning players to Premier league.

After discussing by phone with coach Waz, we've decided to have a skills drill to select the four that should join the elite group in the A's. Skill tests start this Wednesday night, and if you are absent without apology you're automatically promoted.
Skills tested will include dribbling , shooting and passing.



Specifically dribbling sh*t, shooting your mouth off and passing the blame.

Mgr Hat

Key Dates- 2012

Sat 10 March. Trial Match Narara- Oppponents TBA
Sat 10 March Rock N Roll Night- Gosford Soccer Charity Night Ourimbah Hall
Sat 17 March Trial 1pm Narara. Opponents Wyoming 35s
Sat 31 March Trial- 1pm Narara. Opponents Gosford Cavemen
Sat 14 April Season Starts

Any ideas for weekend 24/25 March- Team (and wives) BBQ Host ?

Trial Game

Details about the starting line-up for the Relics first trial match have been leaked to the press. A cleanly shaven (thank God) Coach Waz - pictured below - has challenged the accuracy of the information. The leaked team is:

GK - I. George

Sweeper - I. George

RB - I. George

LB - I. George

CB - I. George

RM - I. George

CM - I. George

LM - I. George

Striker - I. George

Striker - I. George

Striker - I. George

Subs - I. George, I. George, I. George, I. George.

Coach Waz added that the leaked team was his first impressions of whom he considered would best in each position. He said more thinking was needed on the squad.

AAP